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AREA OF RESCUE / AREA OF REFUGE

for Anis 

When I shot the moon down I planted a sunflower for each of the birds who had nothing to do with my bad aim. Only when I died did I realize my poor attempt at symmetry. But I (& you too & you too, too) forgot to factor that in: time. I blame my glass hands. I blame the smudges left on them by everything I’ve tried to move or hold still. There’s no in between, but that’s where I am. This is why the word gentle must be deliberate. This is why wept can never be. I’ve never shot anything. But the light, here. How could I lie? 

 

 

WAXING AS IN HALF-FULL

for Rachel C. 

I had a daydream today in which I got the word FLIGHT tattooed on my wrist & I was scared to show anyone & because I was so scared my heart rate increased & I felt my blood say FLIGHT, FLIGHT, FLIGHT until I showed someone & they said what’s the significance of the word FIGHT to you & I snapped out of it & listened to my belly growl & I had to look up the definition of nourish before I could do anything about it. I ate a hamburger & thought about you in your cave. It’s easy for me because I stay cold. I used to think I had snow in me, just under my shoulders & in my lungs & I could feel the little paw prints from dogs I’ve never seen move across me. But now I’m not so sure. But now I’m standing at my kitchen window, tapping as I make a plan. You know how this is. I’m going to find my wild. I read recently that the average cloud weighs about 1.1 million pounds. If you believe that, then I will, too.

 

 

WHEN YOUR TOWN IS TOO DARK

for Sara W. 

I wonder about orbit a lot. I’m not sure if I believe it. Things appear & then dissolve, almost like they were meant to, but, it’s more than that. When I wake up in the morning the first thing I see is the underside of my pillow. I have to ease myself into being alive again, again, again. & I love it. Don’t get me wrong, I love it. I love so many things, it’s difficult to be responsible for hands. I love being able to fold myself small enough to be a new planet. I love eating eggs. How can we wake up & go through the day, with no way of being sure the moon will come back? I say good morning, &, yes, it’s true.